In a Pine Tree
by Spirix
Summary: On the first day of Amestris the state gave to me.... A light and funny holiday fic, no pairings. Have a holly, jolly Xmas from Spirix!


**Summary:** Guess, it's a gift! Come on, you know you want to shake the box.

**Disclaimer:** I hate this part; it just reminds me of my lack of owning such a great story. I don't own the ORIGINAL song either. These lyrics are mine so back off :P

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**In a Pine Tree!  
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"On the first day of Amestris, the state gave to me: a pocket watch in a pine tree." Edward sang quietly. He had his hands in his pockets and a cocky smirk traced his lips. He saw a couple people glance at him but continued on their way.

He continued on a little louder, "On the second day of Amestris, the state gave to me: two unpolished boots and…a pocket watch in a pine."

More people turned their heads but continued on about their stately business. Edward closed his eyes and raised his voice another notch. He was barely over a whisper now.

"On the third day of Amestris, the state gave to me: three documents to sign, two unpolished boots and," he paused to add to the drama, "a pocket watch in a pine tree."

Fuery walked by his parade ground spot and stop. He looked at Edward and looked behind him. "Oh no…" was all he said as he rushed into the Central Headquarters.

Edward shifted his eyes evilly and raised his voice to a speaking low level. "On the fourth day of Amestris, the state gave to me: four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two unpolished boots and… a pocket watch in a pine tree."

A young private eyed him for a moment, and then the thing behind him. His eyes were wide but he sat down on the pavement quietly, ready to watch the show.

"On the fifth day of Amestris, the state gave to me," Edward took in a bog breath, "FIVE SHIRTLESS ARMSTRONGS! Four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two dull boots and… a pocket watch in a pine tree." The private gasped and waved his buddy to come sit also. He brought with him three other proud new members of the military.

"On the sixth day of Amestris, the state gave to me: six magazine clips, FIVE SHIRTLESS ARMSTRONGS! Four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two dull boots and… a pocket watch in a pine tree." Edward was really getting into it now. His voice wasn't as loud as it could get yet but with each new verse his took up the volume. The crowd around him was thickening with unfamiliar faces. Not good enough yet.

"On the seven day of Amestris, the state gave to me: seven inkless pens, six magazine clips, FIVE SHIRTLESS ARMSTRONGS! Four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two dull boots and… a pocket watch in a pine tree."

Fuery dragged Havoc into the cluster of people sitting and standing around Edward. H looked at Edward and looked behind the blonde. Havoc let his face look confused and sat down near the front, dragging Fuery with him.

"On the eighth day of Amestris, the state gave to me: eight library overnight passes, seven inkless pens, six magazine clips, FIVE SHIRTLESS ARMSTRONGS! Four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two dull boots and… a pocket watch in a pine tree."

Falman sat next to Havoc with the same bewildered expression. The massively canvas behind Edward cast a shadow over them as the sun set. It was time for them all to leave but no one wanted to go just yet. Edward continued on in a surprisingly strong singing voice. He was quiet good.

"On the ninth day of Amestris, the state gave to me: nine messengers running, eight library overnight passes, seven inkless pens, six magazine clips, FIVE SHIRTLESS ARMSTRONGS! Four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two dull boots and… a pocket watch in a pine tree."

Armstrong sparkled at the thought of five of him. That would be truly delightful. He explained such to Breda but the other man just sighed and sat next to Fuery.

"On the tenth day of Amestris, the state gave to me: ten bullets flying, nine messengers running, eight library overnight passes, seven inkless pens, six magazine clips, FIVE SHIRTLESS ARMSTRONGS! Four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two dull boots and… a pocket watch in a pine tree."

Edward was well into now. His crisp voice echoed off the buildings as the street lights turned on.

"On the eleventh day of Amestris, the state gave to me: eleven solders marching, ten bullets flying, nine messengers running, eight library overnight passes, seven inkless pens, six magazine clips, FIVE SHIRTLESS ARMSTRONGS! Four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two dull boots and… a pocket watch in a pine tree."

"What is this?" asked the Fuhrer as he looked at the massive crown, than at Edward and finally to the big covered thing behind him. Hughes smiled next to him and simply replied, "I have no idea Sir."

"On the twelfth day of Amestris, the state gave to me," Edward paused and sucked in as much air as he could before belting out,

"Twelve mess hall dinners,  
Eleven soldiers marching,

Ten bullets flying,

Nine messengers running,

Eight library overnight passes,

Seven inkless pens,

Six magazine clips,

FIVE SHIRTLESS ARMSTRONGS!"

Hawkeye pocket Maes and gestured him to the side. "Have you seen the colonel?" Maes grinned, pointed to Edward and responded, "I think we are about to find out."

Edward grinned and held his hands just together not touch the palms. "Four useless missions, three unsigned documents, two dull boots and," he clapped, "A STATE ALCHEMIST POCKET WATCH IN A PINE TREE!"

His transmutation lit the parade square as the big tarp fell away. A lush green pine tree covered in blue and silver cat ornaments stood before the crowd. Many cooed and made other sounds of awe as Al plugged a massive cord into a generator. It illuminated in pretty white lights. Hawkeye smiled at the beautiful display and then dropped her papers. Colonel Roy Mustang was tied to the top of the tree with what look like a…

"Hey, is that his pocket watch chain?" Maes asked with a cheesy smile.

Al waved his arms from in front of the tree, "Merry Christmas Amestris!"

Edward made a gagging sound and yelled louder, "Have a very satisfactory, nondenominational-"

"FULLMETAL, GET ME DOWN!" a certain alchemist screeched.

"Gift-giving time of year!" Edward finsihed with a bow.

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Happy Holidays!!!! From Spirix :D 


End file.
